From checking new members to banning poetry: Nine rules for a successful book club
My name is Liadán, and I have a problem with book clubs. Specifically, with starting and/or joining them. I am currently a member of three, two of which I founded, one of which is holding its first meeting tomorrow.
The past is filled with other failed attempts to form book clubs. I’ve been rejected for everything from disgust, “we’re too young to be in book clubs”, in my 20s to, more recently, “I don’t like socializing”.
There’s a fourth book club in our house – my eight-year-old daughter and her friends started one last summer. The plan is to meet and discuss their favorite Diary of a Shy Boy.
She held our first (and so far only) meeting at our home, and it quickly became clear what the priorities were. Big planning has gone into what snacks will be offered for the day. In contrast, my printout of my suggested talking points of the day received blank stares of complete disinterest from both girls.
Within 15 minutes, the book club was abandoned for Britney v Beyonce, with each girl taking on a role and taking turns to see which song Spotify would play next. It became clear that the book club was really just an excuse to get together. An age-old approach brings me to my first rule.
Rule 1
The book can be an excuse to meet
Whether you are founding or joining, before going any further, let’s clarify what kind of club this is. A book that puts the book above all else, actually prioritizing reading things its members might not consider, or a loosely disguised encounter that might, if the mood were to rise, turns into a Beyonce/Britney song, or, at the very least, the conversation shifts from the book within 15 minutes.
You can be super niche, addressing only one genre, like Jane Austen Book Club, the 2007 film starring Emily Blunt, based on Karen Joy Fowler’s 2004 book. It’s all valid, but you need to know what you’re doing and do you agree to it.
Rule 2
The guest list can include anyone you want
A book club I’m a member of was founded by a woman who asked six friends, then asked them to also invite someone they knew. I was brought in by my cousin, so I didn’t know anyone else when I joined.
The founder, an avid reader, really wants to read books she might not have known about – new people mean new ideas. This is a club that’s very much driven by reading material, rather than catching up, but it’s also a fun way to get to know people completely outside of your current circle.
Video of the day
This kind of club can seem like a moment to take you away from your everyday life; they don’t know what’s going on with you and in a few hours you can turn it all off.
Of the two book clubs I founded, one was made up of women I knew briefly at work and always wanted to get to know better, but knew we would never get over the continuum. tell each other that we have to go out for coffee sometimes.
Instead, I suggested 12 of them join the book club. The other group consists of an existing group of friends – this is simply an excuse to see each other more. Our first meeting is this Friday.
Rule 3
Opt out and then never pop up
Gathering a group of adults together is a challenge at the best of times. Chances are, the book club will be a group of people, rather than your main social group, making it a bit less of a priority for everyone’s I-need-to-sees. People.
Everyone misses about a month (that’s why you should invite at least 10 members because you’ll never have more than eight people join in a month), but if you really can’t commit , leave or opt out in the first place. Repeated absences weaken the group for others.
Rule 4
New members must be deleted by the entire group
Every book club needs an occasional refresh, a large influx of new members to replace the few who inevitably leave. This goes without saying, but new members need to be deleted by the whole group.
A book club is a delicately balanced ecosystem. At the very least, you need to check that the other members feel comfortable talking freely (gossip about people on Instagram who are bothering them) in front of any rookies.
Close
Actually reading the book is essential. Photo: Posing
5 rule
Don’t be a poet
Your red line may not be poetry – although I do know of a group that almost fell apart because of an uprising when one of their members suggested poetry – but know your crowd.
It can be literary fiction, biographies, horror – everyone has their own bete noire. Book clubs need to find the right balance between increasing the diversity of their members’ reading material and making choices that people will loathe to the point that they’ll ignore and lose interest.
Rule 6
Hate your book choice is allowed
I once recommended Jon Ronson’s Personality test and not a single person in the book club liked it. Since then, I’ve been worried that they thought I was some sort of psychopath for enjoying it so much that other people hated it.
I also nominated Anna Burns’ Milk delivery man, an interesting yet challenging final book, and then recklessly missed a meeting to discuss this nearly 400-page book. I feel my club members resent my absence and suspect that I, unlike them, have not bothered to read the book I supported the group (for good reason, I read and loved it). Just as I no longer allow myself to suggest movies on movie night, I’ve since banned myself from suggesting books.
Rule 7
What happens in the book club stays in the book club
This should also go for the book club WhatsApp group. The book club could be where you find another person sharing that niche annoyance with someone on social media you’ve both never met and send each other screenshots of the social media output theirs as a form of conversation.
Or it could be where you and a complete stranger discuss your divorce. Such secrets and confidants should be allowed to exist in the privacy and safety of the club.
Rule 8
Don’t make your own book
Admittedly this is a niche market, only applicable to those of us who have written a book and are also members of a club sweet enough to suggest doing it for a meeting. meeting. “What are you doing?” Another friend and author gasped in horror when I told her I was doing it with my last book. I admit that having kept that in mind, I am now sick of the thought of a close-up, in-person review.
Recently, I read an article in which a journalist speculated that the key to writing a book is to overcome your stress and lack of confidence that you are good at it, believe that you can do it, and believe that you can do it. continue with it. As someone who has written two books, I beg to differ.
Writing a book is about accepting that for most, if not all, parts of the process, you’ll feel like this is complete garbage and learn to get over that feeling despite it. The last thing any author wants to do is sit in a room with people they know and discuss said book, even if those people are just saying lovely things. Awful. Avoid at all costs.
Rule 9
You must read the book
This should be given, but it really isn’t. I am a regular offender about this, I mumbled “a lot of reading for work this month” to get out of trouble. And while one of my all-time favorite book club moments is when the two members re-enact an entire plot, it’s best if you put in the effort. Or do what my mom’s old book club did, give up the pretense and become a food club.
https://www.independent.ie/entertainment/books/from-vetting-new-members-to-banning-poetry-nine-rules-for-a-successful-book-club-42333895.html From checking new members to banning poetry: Nine rules for a successful book club