Gemma Collins hopes to be ‘best mom on earth’ as ​​she makes peace with her past

Former TOWIE star Gemma Collins has spoken openly about her plans to start a family in the new Channel 4 documentary Gemma Collins: Self-Harm and Me

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Gemma Collins: Self-Harm and Me Preview from Channel 4

Gemma Collins was brutally honest about her hope of becoming a mother Channel No. 4 documentary about self-harm.

The 41-year-old reality TV star decided to make this hour-long film to find out why people self-harm and how it can affect their loved ones. any.

As well as her close family and friends, Gemma’s fiancé Rami Hawash is also in it many times and recalls when he once entered Gemma after she had cut herself.

During their emotional conversation, Gemma admitted: “In my mind, because obviously we want to continue having children and everything and I feel very happy with you and very settled with you. you, and I think that’s always in the back of my mind, you think, ‘Oh will it come back?’ “

However, after speaking with many people including her own therapist, Gemma was relieved to discover that having children doesn’t necessarily stir up those old feelings.

“I definitely made peace with it all and that’s why I’m ready for the next chapter,” she said at the end of the documentary.

“I want my baby, I want the cat, I want the dog, I want my baby. I hope to be the best mother on earth, but everyone says that, right?

“It’s going to be difficult. Mom will want to put him in dance school as soon as he’s born and I’ll be like ‘mom’,” Gemma joked.

Her comment refers to her mother Joan encouraging her to sing, dance, and perform as a child.

“I remember being really unhappy at school, I always felt misunderstood. I couldn’t stand it because of the teachers, I don’t think they were used to my personality,” Gemma said. about his childhood.

“My mother grew up without any confidence and she always said, ‘I never wanted you to be like that,'” Gemma continued.

“I’m never allowed to be shy, it’s always ‘get up and perform Gemma, sing Madonna Gemma’. It’s a bit much but if that’s what makes her happy, you know, but I’m not at the moment. Everyone’s in the mood.”

Speaking of suppressing her emotions, Gemma added: “Obviously I could never really let my emotions build up and flare up, so I started cutting myself off like that. a deliverance.”

Gemma began self-harming as a teenager but says she hasn’t done it since her early thirties.

For support on coping with self-harm, see mind.org.uk/selfharm or call Mind’s secret Infoline on 0300 123 3393.

For further help or advice, please visit: https://www.channel4.com/4viewers/help-support

Gemma Collins: Self-Harm and Me is available to watch on All 4.