A reader turns to the Mirror’s agonizing aunt, Coleen Nolan, for advice after she finds out she’s pregnant despite having an affair with her husband’s baby
Image: Getty Images)
My life is a mess and I don’t know how to organize it. I’ve been cheating on my husband for a while with someone I met through a friend.
He’s exciting and sexy even though he’s also married with one kid.
For a long time I’ve stalled in my marriage, but I’ve ignored the issue and I suppose this affair has made it even easier to avoid the troubles at home.
My husband and I were together long before we got married and probably should have split up rather than walking down the aisle. We were teenage sweethearts and I think we both just expected to always be together.
We almost never have sex, but a few months ago we came home after he went out with his buddies and I went out with mine.
We both had a few drinks and ended up having sex.
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I have now discovered that I am pregnant, I know it is definitely his and I have no idea what to do.
My husband is over the moon, but I don’t want to stay in this marriage. The man I had an affair with says that nothing changes for him and that he still wants to be with me.
How do I organize my life?
Did you really not think you could get pregnant? You don’t seem to be thinking about the consequences of the decisions you are making in the moment.
I think it’s important to take control and not just let things happen, and that means facing this affair and what you’re going to do about it.
If you really don’t want to be with your husband, then you need to tell him that. You can’t stay with him for the baby – bringing a child into a broken relationship won’t fix it.
Yes, your husband will be angry and hurt, and likely many other people will be too, especially if you’ve been a couple for a long time.
But when the news is out and all the drama is over, you can start thinking about how to move on.
I’m not sure what this other man is promising you though – does he intend to leave his wife or does he just want to keep sleeping with you when he says the baby won’t change anything?
Don’t leave your husband for him. If you are ending the marriage, make sure it’s the right decision for you.
https://www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/sex-relationships/i-been-cheating-husband-now-27331538 "I cheated on my husband but now I'm pregnant with his baby and not happy" - Coleen Nolan