“I get bullied so much about my son’s name – I want to change it so he doesn’t get bullied”

Naming your child is one of the most daunting tasks you’ll likely ever have to do — and this mom genuinely regrets her decision because people assume her son is a girl

baby and mom
Mom assumed the name was gender neutral, but people keep getting it mixed up (stock image)

Choosing a baby name is a difficult task for parents as they have to make sure it is perfect.

Despite spending months trying to find something just perfect, some end up regretting their decision and discussing swapping it out for something else.

A mother found herself in this situation and went to Mumsnet to ask the parents for advice on the unisex name she chose for her little boy, who is now seven months old.

She explained that she received a lot of negative reactions to the name, which she assumed was gender neutral and most people assume it’s a girl. The comments have made her fear her son will be bullied as he gets older if she doesn’t change it.

She explains: “We thought we’d chosen a unisex name as we liked it for a girl and for a boy. Turns out, since we named him and introduced him to the world, no one had heard of a boy by that name and I’ve had so many comments from people assuming he’s a girl.

The mother wondered if she should change her son’s name (stock image)

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“I’m really disappointed as this was the only name my husband and I could agree on and I’m really worried that our son will struggle with this throughout his life.

“I really wish we had given it a different name, although I don’t know what that would have been. I think about it all the time and hate introducing him to people by name now because I’m just anticipating their reaction.

“I had it in a baby group where the teacher called him ‘she’ during one of the songs and I had to correct her. She said she had never heard of a boy by that name, so thought he was a girl, even though he was dressed in what would be considered “boys clothes”.

“I’ve had people who think he’s a boy and say, ‘What’s his name?’ Then when I answer, they say, ‘Oh, she’s a girl,’ no! It’s really disappointing and I hate that it’s being talked about. My mother was having trouble at the hairdresser’s when another person overheard her and commented that it was a girl’s name.

People jumped in defense of mother (stock image)

“It just feels like everywhere and I’m really upset that he’s going to be taking the brunt of it. I don’t really know what people are supposed to say here. I hesitate to say his name as it seems no boy has ever been called that before it’s fully obvious, but I just wanted to see if others would feel the same way in my shoes and what you would do.”

Some were quick to defend the mother, saying others were narrow-minded.

One wrote: “People are rude. There are many people with unisex or the “other” gender name who have had no problems – people just accept it. E.g. female Jack Monroe, Cameron Diaz, etc.”

Another said: “So maybe a name like Eden which is mostly used for girls names in the UK and considered a boys name in other countries.

“It’s hard to say without knowing the name, but I see no problem in changing your child’s name as long as it’s an informed decision. Do you even have another name in mind?”

Others suggested changing the name slightly, but not enough for them to lose their identity: “Can you change it to something similar or similar-sounding so you don’t lose its identity entirely?” Mumsnet is great for ideas.”

Supporting unisex names, some moms wrote, “I think this style of naming is going to be more popular…”

Others supported the mother as they have unusual or difficult-to-pronounce names themselves.

One said: “A name is honestly what you make of it. I have a foreign name that is never pronounced correctly by British people. I just got used to having my name butchered even after correcting people.

“You’re always going to get ignorant people about names, whether pronunciation or association.

“Is it a name that’s likely to come up more often as a unisex name?

“I think you should just own it. Your child may appreciate having an unusual name when they are older. I still love having my unique name, even with the wrong pronunciations!”

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