DEAR DEIDRE: I WANT to move back to my hometown but my boyfriend insists on staying. We are both 48.
We live in London together. I moved here 20 years ago.
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I have no family here and my friends are also drifting away.
I have been with my partner for five years. We both hate our jobs and live in a rented apartment.
I want to go back to the north where I made good friends from many years ago. I visit home often and have always loved it.
I’m always busy when I’m there, while my days off here I spend going for a walk while my partner goes away on his bike.
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I begged my partner to move north with me but he refused, saying he wouldn’t like it.
I am becoming more and more unhappy. I am torn about staying here for the sake of my partner – but at the expense of my own happiness.
DEIDRE SAYS: If you move out and your partner doesn’t like it, can’t he just come back and start his old life again?
Suggest your partner visit the North a few times to get a feel for the area you are looking for before he makes the right decision.
Without an agreement, perhaps the relationship is no longer important to either person.
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