DEAR DEIDRE: I STOP my girlfriend cheating on me with her lesbian friend.
Ever since she started spending a lot of time with this woman, things have gone downhill in our relationship.
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My girlfriend is 33 years old and I am 35 years old. We have been living together for four years and until recently, I did not talk about marriage and children.
But about six months ago, something changed. It was like someone turned off the light bulb in our relationship.
My girlfriend stopped wanting sex, became less emotional, and then moved out of our bedroom. Her excuse was that she needed more sleep and I pulled the blanket.
Then she started saying that she had doubts about our future, even though she fell in love with me. She just “needs time” to figure out what she wanted.
This all coincided with the arrival of her old college friend, who had just moved back to our city after breaking up with her longtime partner.
This friend, 34, came out as gay about 5 years ago.
Since her return, my girlfriend has seen her two or three times a week, and texts her every day.
She says she’s helping her because she’s in a state, but I think there’s a lot more going on.
As far as I know, my girlfriend has never been attracted to women before. But she seems too close to this woman.
On her birthday, her friend sent her a card in which she wrote “I love you, you are the world to me.”
My girlfriend didn’t put it on the cupboard with her other cards, I found it in her briefcase.
All issues receive a personal response, usually within 24 hours on weekdays.
If this is a guy we’re talking about, I’m sure I’d have told her about the affair, and we’d probably be over.
Am I being played for a fool? Is my girlfriend bisexual? Should I ban her from seeing her friends? Help!
DEIDRE SAYS: Forbidding your girlfriend from seeing her friends will not solve your relationship problems. It can only make things worse.
The timing could be a coincidence – you have no proof that something is going on or that the relationship is sexual.
Your girlfriend can spend time with her friend to avoid any problems in your relationship. She may be confiding in her.
To solve this, it is necessary to have a heart and be honest with each other.
Let’s say you care and want to get things back on track. Ask what you can do to change things.
My support package, Caring for Your Relationship, shows you how to build trust between you and work on your married life.
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https://www.thesun.ie/dear-deidre/8164730/worried-girlfriends-cheating-me-lesbian-friend/ I’m worried my girlfriend is cheating on me with her lesbian friend