I cried at my son’s wedding a month ago. No wonder, one might say. For me, however, it wasn’t that the tears came as a shock; Rather, it was the timing that surprised me.
I felt a little overwhelmed throughout the service, especially during the vows and later during the sermons as I was so lovingly remembered for my late husband, who was my son’s stepfather for 20 years. But I didn’t really cry. Not then.
It was moon flow it made me cry, those real tears that roll down my face and once they start they just won’t stop.
moon flow? For real? Yes, because when the singer turned his gaze to the newly married couple, the words hit home in a way I had never thought of. “Two drifters to see the world; there is so much world to see; We’re after the end of the same rainbow, waiting around the bend…”
What a wonderful and joyful new beginning for my boy and his bride, I thought as those sentimental words echoed around the room and their future together flashed before my eyes. And what an ending, I thought too – an ending in the form of a change, a total, as it should be, change in the nature of our 33-year mother-son relationship. And so the tears flowed – happy-sad tears for all the past and all the years to come.
Endings are on my mind because I read Geoff Dyer’s book The Last Days of Roger Federer: And Other Endings. It’s an engaging read and a thought-provoking treatise on the essence of endings, endings, endings, endings – call them what you will.
Dyer is a tennis nerd, so Federer’s impending retirement plays a part in the book, but there’s so much more to this than that. Focusing on the endgame of writers, musicians and sports stars who have shaped him over the years , Dyer also raises other questions about the bigger picture. When does the end begin? How early can it be too late?
As in Dyer’s reflections, so also in ordinary everyday life; It’s about knowing when it’s time to let go, move on, put something to bed.
At a time of year when families experience new beginnings, as children return to the classroom or leave the nest for further education, let’s not forget that endings are just as important. For how can we look forward when we are always looking back? How can we start over if we don’t admit that something has changed? Sometimes for the worse, but often for the better.
In the cycle of birth and death of life, it’s amazing how these two defining Goliaths can often clash, even within the same family. Four hours after my husband received the devastating news that his cancer treatment was no longer working, his grandson was born. birth and death; a beginning and an end.
When does the end begin? When does the beginning end? Whatever the answer, and while I firmly believe that the end is an important reality of life, I will continue to insist, as poet Brendan Kennelly did, “that forever we begin”.
https://www.independent.ie/opinion/comment/at-a-time-of-new-beginnings-heres-to-conclusions-too-41952048.html In a time of new beginnings here too conclusions