“Mom had sex with my boyfriend and my twin slept with my husband – I can’t trust anyone” – Coleen Nolan

The Mirror’s agonizing aunt Coleen Nolan counsels a woman who can’t get over the betrayals of her past – including her mother cheating with her then-boyfriend and her sister sleeping with her husband

Dear Coleen

When I was 15, my mother cheated on my then-boyfriend – she was 38 at the time and I thought she was in a happy marriage.

As you can imagine it was awful and a real shock.

Later, when I was married and had a young child, I believed myself twin Sister slept with my husband. Now, more than 20 years later, I’m in the middle of a difficult divorce and I feel so emotionally scarred by what happened.

I am in a new relationship but given my history I am concerned about how I will be able to deal with it emotionally.

I hope you can help.

What advice would you give this reader? Share your opinion in the comment section

Coleen says

Being in the middle of a painful situation divorce Difficult memories and emotions from past relationships are bound to surface, and you will feel very vulnerable.

With that in mind, I think it’s wise to take this new relationship very slowly and not try to run before you can run. If your partner loves you, they’ll understand that you’re struggling with a lot of emotional baggage and will be happy to go at your pace.

Focus on getting through the divorce before making any decisions with this new relationship.

In terms of dealing with emotional scars, I really think it would be helpful to seek counseling.

Not only to help you with the divorce, but also to process what happened to your mother and sister. If you’ve never actually spoken out about this betrayal, it would be helpful to do so so you can approach your new relationship with strength and positivity. Much luck.