‘Mum freed during Covid slowdown with diagnosis of Asperger’s and ADHD aged 65’

Lucy Beaumont tells how her mum was diagnosed with multiple neurodivergent diseases during lockdown, but time allowed her to discover why she found certain things so challenging

With all the talk of Partygate and the Sue Gray report this week, it feels a little like it’s time to reflect on the past two years and how Covid, lockdown and the return to a new normal have each have been influenced differently by us.

There is no question what was going on in No. 10 during this most difficult time was wrong.

But looking back at the pandemic is the first time I can see what I and my family have gained from it.

During lockdown my mum aged 65 was diagnosed with High Functioning Female Asperger’s, ADHD and Alexithymia.

You may not have heard of the last condition that affects how you express and process emotions, but it’s reported to affect one in 10 people.

The diagnosis only came about because the world was slowing down.

Lockdown has allowed me and my mum to reflect on how she has struggled in certain situations – and excelled in others.

More and more women in particular are being diagnosed with neurodiversity later in life, and celebrities like Christine McGuinness and Melanie Sykes have spoken openly about it in recent months.

And sometimes just having a diagnosis is enough to understand yourself.

For Mom, the guilt of not belonging, sometimes being seen as rude or poorly brought up means life has been a roller coaster.

Those feelings were replaced with a feeling of living beyond survival mode.

As the adult child of an autistic parent, I immediately turned to the internet for guidance and support for myself.

My mother is very caring and protective of me, if anything she is overly sensitive.

It must have been difficult for her as a single parent.

We’ve been through a lot, the past is the past, but the diagnosis triggered a lot of emotional feelings in me.

I feel like I had more advantages than disadvantages as a child of a mother with Asperger’s, but children can feel overlooked or need to act like the parents.

There can be “no filter” comments and a parent may need “vice” as a crutch to ease their pain.

Our story is unique to us and is not a commentary on others and their abilities to be neurodiverse and parenting.

But it would be great to see radical change in this area and support for children, along with a reduction in NHS wait times for diagnosis.

If only someone sat down with my eight year old self to explain why my mother found life so difficult and that it wasn’t my fault.

Gosh, I hope the support improves.

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