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My girlfriend can’t stop criticizing me but I still love her

DEAR DEIDRE: HOWEVER did I do or say, my girlfriend felt guilty and let me down.

Her constant criticism is making me miserable. I am a 38 year old guy and she is 35 years old. We have lived together for seven years.

I try to be a good partner but nothing is good enough for her

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I try to be a good partner but nothing is good enough for her

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I try to be a good partner – cook, wash dishes, hang out, buy her little gifts – but nothing is good enough for her.

She will always find something negative, such as a stain on a plate, a burn on her dinner, or a small piece of paper dropped on the floor.

If I make her a special dinner, she’ll say I’ve gained weight and we should eat healthier. But if I lose weight, she will say I look skinny. It drove me crazy.

If you’re wondering why I’m still with her, it’s because she wasn’t always like this.

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All issues receive a personal response, usually within 24 hours on weekdays.

Before her mother passed away two years ago, she was much happier and sweeter. I think she might be depressed but she won’t talk about it.

How can I help her and save our relationship?

DEIDRE SAYS: Your girlfriend hasn’t dealt with the impact of her mother’s death.

Instead of confronting her feelings, she pushes them away and focuses her negative emotions on other things.

And as the person closest to her, you are bearing her unhappiness.

She needs support. Try talking to her and ask her to help you with grief.

My support packages on Bereavement will tell you more. In addition, Sue Ryder (sueryder.org) can give advice.

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