“My sister ruined my wedding – now my parents expect me to pay for her therapy”

A woman has asked for much-needed advice after she claimed her sister had caused trouble in her family for years and cost everyone money – now her parents want her to help pay

Angry Bride
Her sister ruined the wedding (stock photo)

It’s no secret that families can be messy and complicated at times — with secrets, feuds, and all sorts of drama.

One woman has claimed to know all too well what it’s like to deal with it all and shared her own complicated family history.

The unnamed woman revealed all in a letter to an anguished aunt after her sister’s behavior became too much for her.

Write to Slate.com’s “Dear Prudence” column, The woman explained how her sister had caused problems in her life for a number of years – starting with ruining their wedding.

The letter tells how both siblings got engaged in the same year, but her sister’s wedding was called off after she was caught cheating – she then lost her job as her boss was her fiancé’s mother.

The sisters haven’t spoken to each other in years (stock photo)


(Getty Images/iStockphoto)

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“I’ve lost what little sympathy I had for her behavior when she overheard even a whiff of my wedding plans – sneering, sighing, giggling and slamming doors. Everyone expected me to walk around them on eggshells, but their behavior went on for months and months.

“At my wedding she got drunk and made a huge scene implying that my husband and his best friend were secretly fucking around. She had to be escorted out. Her excuse to me was that she was sorry she had too much to drink. I told her I didn’t want her in my life until she got professional help. She called me a smug bitch.”

She goes on to say that she hasn’t spoken to her sister in three years and her behavior hasn’t improved in that time.

She claims she was fired twice, sued by her roommate for non-payment of rent and caught shoplifting.

Rather than get her to pay her dues, the woman claims her parents bailed her sister out – but they’re running out of money.

They have now insisted their daughter needs therapy but they are retired and don’t have the funds to pay for it.

So her other child is expected to pay for it.

She seems outraged by the idea, adding: “While my husband and I both work, we have college loans and a mortgage to think about. We’re not exactly looking for change on the couch, but our savings are small. My parents blame me – my sister is finally doing what I always wanted and I can’t support her She is sick and hurt, why can’t I support her?

“My husband thinks we should offer to pay for a session or two as a peace offering. I’m tired of playing peacemaker; I did this for months and my sister ruined my wedding as a reward. My parents spent thousands of dollars on my sister, I know they’re exhausted.”

R. Eric Thomas offered some advice as Prudence, warning the sister that while her husband’s offer was kind, it was also a “slippery slope.”

They replied, “I think it’s best to talk to your parents about your boundaries with your sister. From what I’ve read, she still hasn’t fully apologized to you, nor has she asked you to pay for therapy. Therapy is a parental mandate, which doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea, just that you don’t have a say. Your parents can’t spend your money on you.”

Do you agree? Let us know in the comments below.

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