The life of a solo traveler: “From Bali to Bangkok I’ve been everywhere – here’s my advice for anyone who wants to try it”
“My mother sparked my love for travel. When I was younger I used to travel around Europe with her. Then when we moved to Ireland from Lithuania at the age of eight, she would take people on little road trips to places like the Cliffs of Moher and I would accompany them.
When I was 20, I was studying international business at UL, and in third year we had to study abroad. I was traveling alone to Australia and instead of booking a direct flight home I was influenced by some Australians to explore Asia.
I drove from Sydney to Darwin for two days, Bali for two days, Bangkok for two days, Tokyo for two days and Abu Dhabi for two days.
I’ll be honest, I had no idea what I was doing – and I was really scared. I was about to back out and book a direct flight home instead.
When I arrived in Darwin I was a bit overwhelmed after leaving my friends in Australia. I was staying in a hostel and I was pretty upset and crying. But then I met these two Israeli girls who put my mind at ease. They said, ‘A lot of people do this, you’re going to have a great time and you’re going to be fine.’ In that moment, I just knew it was going to be good.
I had the best time in Bali and Bangkok and I met really cool people. That’s how it all started I think. Since then I have traveled alone through dozens of countries. I am currently in Borneo exploring different parts of the island.
Vicinity
Evelina, pictured in Vietnam, says traveling alone gives her the freedom to do what she wants, when she wants
Over the years I’ve learned to travel more slowly. I want to get to know the places I visit better. I’ve also become a lot more confident when it comes to just striking up conversations with people. Sometimes it’s so easy to find something to comment on, or when I hear an interesting accent I might ask, “Where are you from?”. Or I’ll just say, “Hey, what’s your name?” OK, that’s a bit of a ridiculous question, but honestly it works with his car. It makes that connection and you’re actually showing the person that you want to talk to them and get to know them. Plus, it only takes a few seconds of awkwardness to potentially make friends for life.
Some people use dating apps to connect with other people when traveling alone but I think it’s a waste of time. I think the time you spend scrolling and swiping and having the same conversation over and over again just to meet someone for a drink would be better spent actually going to a coffee shop and hoping that someone comes over and you chat with him. And a lot of people [on dating apps] are just passing through. I’d rather stay in a hostel and connect with people that way or check out Facebook groups.
Also, my motto in life is that I’d rather be alone than please someone I don’t get along with just for company…
I’ve met some incredible people over the years. On my second trip to Asia, I went to Malaysia for two weeks. When I got to the hostel I met this group who were like, ‘We’re going to have breakfast. We’ll get bikes. We will explore the island. Do you want to come?’ And I said, ‘I’ve never ridden a bike, but ok.’
Of course it can happen that you choose the “wrong” hostel. Maybe there are local people living there who prefer to keep to themselves, or maybe it’s just not very crowded and you won’t find the people you’d like to spend time with.
Saying this, I think solo travelers can keep to themselves too. You are on your own and do not want to open up to people too quickly. On the other hand, when you are in a group, you somehow have someone supporting you.
I’d be pretty open to speaking to everyone equally. But if I don’t feel it, or if I feel like we don’t have a connection, then I’d probably just move on to someone else. I wouldn’t push it any further just to have someone.
Which is the best country for solo travelers? Thailand, one hundred percent. It’s so easy to get around, there are so many backpackers and it’s absolutely beautiful. Also, the locals are very friendly and it’s quite safe. I taught in northern Thailand for a year and traveled to so many random places there. I never felt unsafe and even in the more remote areas people were extremely friendly.
I think more remote parts of Indonesia might be a bit more challenging for a first-time solo traveler. Or anywhere you haven’t researched yet. I remember going to this random island in the Philippines. I was just looking at the map and I was like, ‘Oh this is close and it’s cheap to get to, I’ll go there!’ There I took the ferry and then went on a sightseeing tour, after which I couldn’t find my way back. I walked for a while and finally managed to stop one of those public transit pickup trucks.
Vicinity
Evelina started solo travel “on a whim”
Does my family worry about me if I’m traveling alone? I guess my mom worries a bit but honestly she was more encouraging than anything. If I don’t text her for a day or two, she might text her “Why don’t you get back to me? I’m worried.’ A short message only lasts a few seconds. And it’s nice to just let her know I’m fine.
I’m very independent and over the years I’ve found that I like doing my own thing. Traveling alone allows me to do whatever I want, whenever I want.
Of course, if you travel a lot alone and then travel with a group, it can get a bit frustrating. Suddenly you have to ask people, “What do you want to eat? Where do you want to go?’ Everything moves much slower, so you have to be patient in that sense.
If you are thinking of traveling alone for the first time, remember that the first experience does not have to be a big trip. Instead of saying, “I’m going backpacking for a year!”, maybe start with a weekend trip and see how it goes. And if it’s not for you, that’s okay too.
Or just sit down in a coffee shop by yourself. And bring your book if you feel unwell. Then you could challenge yourself to go to lunch or dinner alone.
And then maybe if you’re brave enough, go somewhere for a little night and see how it goes.
I started traveling solo on a whim not knowing what I was doing. And the thing is, you learn from your mistakes. It doesn’t have to be perfect.
And while I think solo travel has so many benefits, it really depends on the type of person you are. For many people, traveling solo can be really stressful and difficult because they may not be that social or rely on their friends for initial socializing.
There’s societal pressure to do certain things like buy a house and have babies or whatever. But there’s also that pressure to embark on a great solo travel adventure because it’s so liberating. But it’s not for everyone, and that’s okay too.
However, in my case, traveling solo has literally changed the entire course of my life and what I seek out of life, making me a much more confident person.
Ever since I took that first flight to Asia, I’ve realized that it’s okay to be alone. Solo travel can be empowering, liberating and, in my case, completely life-changing.”
To learn more about Evelina see @evs_adventures
As Katie Byrne was told
https://www.independent.ie/life/the-life-of-a-solo-traveller-ive-been-everywhere-from-bali-to-bangkok-alone-heres-my-advice-for-anyone-who-wants-to-try-it-42245507.html The life of a solo traveler: “From Bali to Bangkok I’ve been everywhere – here’s my advice for anyone who wants to try it”