A pregnant woman is furious when her boyfriend refuses to let her mother into the delivery room for the delivery – believing she will ‘spoil’ the moment.
Image: Getty Images)
As a mother expecting a baby, one of the things you have to decide is who you want in the delivery room at the birth.
And while most women want their partner to hold their hand and witness the birth of their child, many of us might also want another woman we trust to guide us through the process—namely, our mother.
But one mom-to-be on Reddit was furious with her boyfriend after he told her he didn’t want her mom in the delivery room with them because he saw it as their “special moment” that would be “ruined.” if anyone else was there.
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The 23-year-old woman explained that she is planning to give birth at home and that her mother is not only experienced in childbirth but is also a fully qualified midwife who is on hand if anything goes wrong.
she said in her post : “My partner doesn’t want my mother to be involved in the birth, but I do. I am 38 weeks pregnant and planning a home birth. This has been a point of contention for the last few months but after our last discussion a few weeks ago I thought he understood why I wanted my mother there.
“Tonight we had another argument about this, sparked by the fact his whole family has Covid at the moment so won’t be able to come over for a couple of weeks so he doesn’t see him as having a support system whilst I have everyone I want .
“My mum and I have a very close relationship, I just lived with her until I was 19 and moved out and she moved abroad to Australia. Due to Covid I haven’t seen my mother in years and she is flying out tomorrow for a month to see me through the birth and meet her first grandchild.
“Some of my main reasons for wanting her there are: she’s been through it before and I want the support of a woman who has experienced childbirth (if not my mother, I would want my aunt or grandma).
“I want someone there whose only job is to support me so my partner can enjoy the birth of our first baby. My partner and I had only been together a few months when I got pregnant and we’ve only been together a year. While I love him, I don’t know how helpful he will actually be when I’m in pain.
“My mum is also a fully qualified midwife and having her around is like a security blanket in case something goes wrong.
“My partner doesn’t have much knowledge about birth/biology and I’m worried about how he will react to the blood.”
But the woman’s boyfriend has made up his mind and doesn’t want anyone else to witness the birth of their baby, believing only the father should be in the room.
She added: “His reasons are: it should just be our ‘special moment’, in his eyes there should only be the father in the room, he should be enough support for me, and he doesn’t want my mother to take his place and pushes him out of the way.
“I suggested my mum be there during labor but leave during ‘pushing’ so only we would be there when the baby is actually born, but he said it would ruin everything for him anyway.
“I don’t want him to feel left out of a very special time for both of us, but I also feel that as a woman giving birth I have the right to have as much support as I feel I need. “
Commenters on the Reddit post were firmly on the woman’s side, as many of them explained that as the woman giving birth, she has the final say over who she has in the room with her.
One person said, “You’re the one delivering, you decide who’s in the room. Your partner has nothing to say about it.”
While another added: “You both could be having a baby soon but only one of you will endure the birth. You are entitled to all the care and support you need, and your partner is being incredibly selfish if they think otherwise.”
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https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/mum-furious-partner-bans-mum-26528643 The mom-to-be is furious when her partner bans her mum from the delivery room - because she's going to ruin it