I had my twins Evie and Finn 17 years ago and my sister said I became a nicer person after having them.
don’t really contradict her. I stopped taking myself so seriously because you just can’t when you’re covered in poop.
If you’re wondering, “Is that chocolate or poop?” I think this is as real as it gets.
For me, becoming a parent blew me away. It softened everything. I’ve definitely relaxed about pretty much everything in my life.
They need to be more empathetic and considerate of other people’s perspectives, because when children are at the table, it’s a multi-perspective game. That’s how we should all think, whether we have kids or not, but for me it kind of compelled me to go there.
Having children also made me realize that there are two certainties in this life; You will die and your child care will leave you. The planning and precision it takes to be a working parent is military. You must have your primary childcare, secondary childcare, and tertiary childcare set up.
It has also helped me appreciate my time more. Before I had kids, I didn’t value my time in monetary terms, but after I had kids, you always wanted to do something on your own that cost money. You recognize this value.
Children give you different types of energy throughout your life. I didn’t particularly like babies when I was younger, and even the decision to have children was more of an intellectual than some sort of hormonal compulsion.
But then there is that big heart energy that you get when they are first born. You will be sent on a wave of it and you cannot legislate for it. It’s heartbreaking and so spontaneous.
Once they develop into their own personality, which happens very early on, it’s a kind of miracle energy.
I think as a parent you have a choice, try to stay where you are or go limp and let things roll. And you can’t hold on. You must understand that each new phase brings new challenges and new beauties.
We all went to see Diana Ross recently and they love music and are so involved in musical heritage and history. This brings so much joy to my heart.
As my twins got older, the role of the mentor changed. They teach you things like new norms about gender and sexuality. Your expectations of society are more advanced than those of my generation.
My children also help me keep my curiosity about life alive and curiosity keeps us all young.
https://www.independent.ie/life/family/parenting/what-my-kids-have-taught-me-i-became-a-nicer-person-when-my-twins-were-born-41835903.html What My Kids Taught Me: “I became a nicer person when my twins were born”