DEAR DEIDRE: MATCH is meant to be exciting – but my love life is painfully predictable.
I am in a relationship with a married man who texts like clockwork and calls at 5:30pm every day.
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But he only makes time for me on Tuesday nights from 6:30pm onwards.
I am a 40 year old woman and have been married for 25 years until my husband left with a twenty year old secretary. He’s 45 years old.
I was heartbroken but managed to get a job in a bookmaker to clear my mind.
The manager is 49 years old and married. We got a lot of money on Gold Cup day and after paying, he locked the door and opened some champagne for the two of us.
We had a few drinks, then he suddenly walked over to me and stroked my face.
He said, “I’ve liked you since the day you walked in.” I was socked.
He came over to kiss me. It’s been too long since I’ve kissed someone that I couldn’t resist. Things quickly went to the next level and that same day we had sex in his office.
As he got dressed, he said, “I have to be honest, I’m in an unhappy marriage. I sleep downstairs. It worked for us. ”
He asked me if I was ready for our relationship to be “normal” and I agreed. But it turns out that “normal” also means very, very predictable.
He texts me most days when we’re not together at work but only available on Tuesdays.
We always have a drink in the bar of the same hotel, after drinking a bottle of red wine, we go up to the familiar room to have sex. He left at 11:30 pm.
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When he’s not at the bar, he calls me at 5:30pm. That’s when his wife took care of her mother’s meals.
Oh that’s it. That’s been my life for the past ten months. I feel like an idiot. Nothing will change. . . it will be?
DEIDRE SAYS: I do not belive that thing. He is enjoying a very arranged routine because you are his booty, then he trots home for a happy family play with his wife.
Don’t settle for a relationship with no strings attached if this isn’t what you want. You weren’t used to casual sex before, so why start now?
Explain that casual relationships are not your style.
If you really like him but he won’t leave his wife, you may have to work this out and find someone who will put you first.
My Support Package Is Your Lover Not Free? can help you see this for what it really is.
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